Can Preneed or Advance Planning and Aftercare Work Together?
After some twenty-seven years of working with funeral service professionals, I continue to be asked my opinion about the preneed staff providing aftercare services. Even after all of these years, I still hold to my position that aftercare and preneed go hand in hand and indeed complement one another but they should not be done by the same person. In spite of those who feel differently, I continue to hold firmly to my beliefs and I would like to clarify why I feel this way.
Preneed and aftercare are indeed extended services that are provided for families to help with one of the most difficult times in a person’s life. The purpose of both of these services is to help individuals with the emotional issues that arise when a loved one dies. However, when you mix providing grief information, education and support with the sale of a preplanned funeral, your consumer can be given mixed messages about your intentions
Historically, funeral directors have been and still are to some extent selling and they have always seen aftercare as a way to provide a service while asking for the sale. However, when you mix providing grief information, education and support with the sale of a preplanned funeral, your consumer can feel that you are just using the guise helping them to make a sale. Instead of seeing your aftercare services as an extension of the care and concern and service you have provided for them during their time of need, they may see it as a way for you to get your foot in the door to make more money. You do not want to leave that impression.
While preneed is a service, it still and always will be a sale, even if that sale is a way for the family to gain a sense of control, gain peace of mind and take care of their family. Where the problems begin in terms of aftercare is how it is defined and presented to families served. Many people think of aftercare as helping with the social security benefits, death certificates, pension information, life insurance and all of the details that must be taken care of after a death occurs. In its broadest definition, that can be considered a part of aftercare or follow-up services. And all these kinds of things are totally appropriate for the preneed advisor to handle.
However, my company has always defined aftercare as information, education, encouragement and support, which is made available to survivors after a death emphasizing and affirming the importance of ritual and memorialization, with the intention of encouraging optimum healing and growth as one travels their grief journey.
If the funeral home representative is there to help with the details that must be taken care of after a death and there is an opportunity to talk about preneed and even provide the service of writing up a preneed agreement, that is one thing. But if the funeral home representative is the aftercare coordinator and is in the home to give information on grief, support groups and coping skills, this is a visit designed to deal with the emotions of grief and not a time to make a sale.
Over the years, I have had aftercare coordinators say that families will ask about preneed while they are sharing grief information and I have been asked how this should be handled. I will have to agree that preneed arrangements are a way for a family to gain a sense of control during their grieving process. Prearranging is a way to take care of other family members and it feeds the need to nurture during the grief process. I do see prearranging as a positive coping strategy but the aftercare coordinator should be clear about the reason for their visit. The aftercare coordinator should explain that making prearrangements is not the reason for their visit, explain that they are there to support them in their grief. The aftercare coordinator can also let the family know that thoughts of prearranging are an appropriate coping skill and then explain that they will be happy to direct the family’s concerns and desires to make prearrangements with the preneed associates at the funeral home. The aftercare coordinator can then even go to give the family the card of the preneed advisor and if the family would like, the aftercare coordinator can call and set an appointment for the preneed advisor to visit with them.
By keeping the grief information services, the death care services such as death certificates, etc. and preneed sales separate, there can be no misinterpretations about the funeral home’s intentions and the extended services it provides. Aftercare will lead to preneed naturally, referrals can be made to the preneed associates and the services of the funeral home are kept clear and separate.
It might also be helpful to understand that preplanning or prearranging is helpful from a psychological standpoint in situations of long term or terminal illness. Preplanning can help a family acknowledge that death is eminent and it will enable the family to say goodbye and take care of unfinished business. This will also allow you to offer information about bereavement services and to let the family know that through your aftercare services, you will help them understand the process of grief so it is not as overwhelming.
Aftercare and preneed really do go hand in hand, they complete the continuum of funeral care but they must be kept separately in terms of the people delivering the services. At-need, preneed and aftercare complete the funeral service cycle and together they make funeral service a unique and outstanding business. FBA
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Sherry L. Williams, RN,BA,GMS, GRS, is president and founder of Sherry Williams Enterprises and New Leaf Resources. She can be reached at 800-346-3087, or by email at sherry@newleaf-resources.com, or visit www.newleaf-resources.com.
